Keeping the Childcare Givers in Check

Posted on May 23, 2013 by

22398860_BG1I decided to re-post this tonight because of News Story running here in South Carolina.  But I want to let my readers know that this information can be found no matter where you live.  Be selective of whom you leave your precious children with.  (Click on Photo for news story)

 

January 1, 2012

Recently I have found myself beyond saddened by the news reports of child abuse at the hands of less than qualified caregivers. As a stay at home mother of five, I find the stress of taking care of multiple children can be at times overwhelming. I could never see myself losing my temper to the point that I would hurt, humiliate, or even kill any of them. I can only imagine that you out there are just as, if not more, appalled at these acts reported on the news. I am sure that you are also asking the question, “Does this seem to be happening a lot more lately?” Perhaps the way the media plays on the human psyche causes those who can relate to the situation to be more aware of these reports. Either way, it’s sickening.

I am from a generation where if the mother had to work, the grandmother and many times grandfather took care of the children at home. Now that times have changed, grandma is too young to retire, and grandpa can’t afford to, so parents are left looking to outside sources for child care. Having worked briefly in child care myself, I shudder to think about leaving mine in the care of another. Realistically speaking, you have to understand one golden rule; NO ONE is going to love and care for your child like you will. I don’t care how much they put on a show in front of you and make you honestly believe they could take your child in as one of theirs, understand that if your child can’t speak, you will never really know if their intentions are true. They could be the greatest person in the world, or they could completely destroy your life. Trust me, I’ve been in the situation of needing a sitter or losing my job, but common sense kept me from calling up that guy I met in the club last week and asking him to watch my 2 year old daughter or leaving her with my neighbors’ 12 year old who is also home alone. Ok, so those are some simple scenarios everyone should know. Here are some statistics that you should also think about. Home day cares are required to be registered anytime when more than one non family member is being taken care of in the home and can only have up to six children. Registration however is not the same as licensing. Registration requires no sanitary or fire regulation, nor does it require any of the caregivers to be First Aid/CPR certified. So keep in mind, just because Ms. Smith down the way has been taking care of kids for years, doesn’t mean that she’s qualified or fully prepared to. Accidents catch us all off guard, but preparation for them reduces the chances of a tragic outcome.

These laws are in place to help you know who is taking care of your child. Utilize them. Create a file on the child care facility that you choose. In that file request a copy of their child care license as well as the state and federal background reports on all adult workers in the facility or home. With their license number you can run periodic checks to see if any reports have been made against them and you can keep track to make sure the license stays up to date or acquires any violations. I know this sounds excessive, but trust me parents, times have changed. If you can’t take care of your child yourself, and you have to trust someone else, give yourself more piece of mind really knowing who they are with. If your child chokes, will they know what to do? If there’s a fire will they be able to get out? Are you sure this person doesn’t have a history of violence? Ask yourself these questions and more parents. Real child caretakers will not be offended if you do. So keep it real, and keep them safe.

For more information on South Carolina Child Care Regulations visit:

http://childcare.sc.gov/main/general/programs/licensing/index.aspx

For those of you not in South Carolina, Google Child Care Regulations in your state.

All questions and comments can be sent to her directly by emailing: raisin.em.real@gmail.com.

 

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She Just Looks Like She Would Whoop A Child’s Ass

Posted on May 20, 2013 by

article-2326595-19DA79AA000005DC-74_306x303There have been a few times that my daughter has come home crying about another child causing her grief at school invoking that anger within me to make me want to go up to the school and whoop another child’s ass.  But trust me parents.  These natural instincts can be overridden through a basic thinking process called, “I don’t really want to go jail, so I need a minute to think this over”.    Atiffa Browns’ case is all too familiar to me because last year around this time there was a similar scene like this in my daughter’s school involving my mother.  Yes, grandma was on a mission to set a little girl straight.  It was a school dance.  She walked into the auditorium, unchecked, told the DJ to stop the music, grabbed the microphone and called the little girl to come outside to the hallway.  I was not a witness; I just heard from several sources that this is how it went down.  Now it never got physical, and I’m almost sure that my mother would have never touched the child, but some of my childhood memories cause me to question that certainty.  So, no authorities were called, only pride was hurt (both my mother and the child), and nobody went to jail.   My mother however was astonished when my sister and I sat her down and explained to her that she was in the wrong; just as Atiffa is surprised today at the slew of charges against her, “including making terroristic threats, simple assault, reckless endangerment and defiant trespass, stemming from an alleged confrontation with a child inside A.B. Anderson Elementary School in Cobbs Creek Friday.” (Source)

I’m sure Atiffa meant no harm in her actions and surprisingly she is receiving a great deal of community support for her mother lioness actions.  It’s a strong possibility the bully had it coming, and while many of us mothers want to stand and applaud Attifa, it would be irresponsible to do so.  School grounds are not the place to take on vigilante discipline.  It is an institution that operates through a process and in order for that institution to remain successful parents must follow that process.  If parents disagree with that process, there is a process for that too.  The answer to bullying is not a simple one and it doesn’t start with the bully.  It starts with us as parents teaching our children to respect others.  This was a program once taught in schools but our obsession with scores and statistics scrapped that program right along with music, home economics, and shop.  And let’s face it; some parents just don’t put the effort into raising children anymore that should be.  They load their kids up with sugary cereal and drink in the morning and then allow them to be a teacher’s problem for the next 8 hours.  Whether you are the slack parent allowing your child to be a holy terror, or you are the involved parents ready to jump a child to protect your own, we all need to do better.  We need pay attention to legislation that cuts the education budget leaving us without programs that keep our children from falling between the cracks.  We need to support teachers and school officials that are working tirelessly, not for the crappy pay, but because they too believe that children are the key to our future.  Stop spending your money in amusement parks and in the club on the weekends.  Invest in your local schools and attend school district meetings to see how your money is being spent.  We have a voice to change the system, we just have to know when and where to use it.

After my mother went through her little confrontation it was discovered that the incident between my daughter and the other child was typical mean girl behavior being committed by both parties.  No, I didn’t teach my daughter to be a bully.  But I didn’t exactly teacher how NOT to be either.  Parents, we have to take responsibility where responsibility can be taken.  Don’t end up being charged with terrorism like poor Atiffa because you haven’t full evaluated a situation before taking action.  Take time to think.  Take time to Raise Em Real.

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You Will Be Offended, You Will Relate, You Will Laugh Your Ass Off

Posted on May 19, 2013 by

Shit I say on Facebook!!!I have been extremely preoccupied with research on some upcoming articles I plan to post so that’s one of the many reasons its been so quiet on the blog front here.  But no worries.  I’ve had plenty of time for crazy Facebook posts so check out the updated page, and hang in there…RaisinEmReal will be back IN YOUR FACE soon.   In the mean time, enjoy the S#!t I say on Facebook.

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To The Under-Appreciated Mom: Happy Mother's Day

Posted on May 12, 2013 by

Reblogged from Kinda Crunchy:

Click to visit the original post

Maybe you're a single mom. Maybe you're secretly pregnant. Maybe you're married to a man who just isn't into sentimental things like Mother's Day. Or Maybe you just need to hear this from another person: You are a wonderful mom.

Today isn't really any different from other days. You don't go to some fancy brunch in a cute dress. You don't get a mushy card telling you how great of a mom you are.

Read more… 418 more words

As the day has gotten ahead of me it dawned on my that I hadn't posted ANYTHING for mothers day. I came across this on my reader, and had to share. If this day has you a little down...for whatever the reason moms....this will make you feel instantaneously better. Have fun with the kids today, they are the reason this day even exists.
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Child Photographs That Give Perspective

Posted on May 7, 2013 by

B_Id_383113_children-bridge1A few weeks ago I complained about the closing of schools in Chicago being the root of a genocide of sorts for the children of that city.  I did not get much response about the issue, and media has since dropped it as well.  I’m sure parents have put down their protest signs and the sound of these doors closing and cries from the newly unemployed have fallen on deaf ears. I was reminded of the plight of these fellow citizens when I came across a story through the Associated Press that not only inspired me, but caused me to count my blessings.  Things may not be ideal in this country, but it could be a lot worse.  We not only have to fight for what we have, but we have to appreciate it as well.  Hopefully these pictures and the story behind them will inspire you to think of solutions as well.

“NEW DELHI — Their classroom is a flattened patch of dirt and rocks under the elevated rail tracks. Their blackboards are rectangles painted on a chipped concrete wall. Their teacher is a shop owner with no formal training, but a conviction that education is their only hope.” Read More from the Washington Post

B_Id_383118_girl-sweeps

B_Id_383117_RAJESH-KUMAR-TEACHERB_Id_383111_school-children4

B_Id_383106_child-reads

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What Can The Constitution Take from You and Your Children?

Posted on May 7, 2013 by

subpage_crime_and_punishmentI don’t promote television programing for children to watch because honestly, quality programing for children is virtually non-existent.  Although I will admit that BabyFirst TV has been a life saver over the past few years.  However, the rest of the usual cartoon suspects, right down to Dora and Diego, tend to leave me questioning their suggestive influential subjects.  I’m not going to start about killing kiddie television here, but as I was watching one of my favorite programs last night (The News) a statement was made that I just couldn’t fathom.  The United States has the highest prison population of any country in the world.  Talk about breaks and screeching tires…say what???  (Read more here)

I couldn’t sleep after hear that.  I spent the remaining hours of the wee morning on search engines and pondering just how easy it is to be locked up for a crime that you didn’t commit.  Or worse yet, something that you didn’t even know was a crime, but became a chargeable offense under the arm of the law that you didn’t even know existed anymore, but was dug up for personal or political gain.

During 2011, the number of prisoners under the jurisdiction of state and federal correctional authorities declined by 0.9%, from 1,613,803 to 1,598,780.  A closer look at the figures show that over the last three years there has been a slight decrease in male inmates while female inmates steadily rose, causing me to wonder how many of them are mothers, and how many children have been left out here with us, motherless.  You can find more details in the Bureau of Statistics report here.

I couldn’t sleep not because I feared for my own freedom, but because I feared that the loss of my freedom would ruin the lives of my children.  Then I began to think about the children in this country with incarcerated parents, and the ripple effect that period of incarceration would have on all their lives.  And that’s when I decided that it might be important to really know my Constitutional Rights.  The next few hours I spent delving through The Constitution, and as the sun came up, I found myself disheartened.  Here I had come to believe through the steady repetition of others stating, “I know my Constitutional Rights” or “That’s a violation of our Constitutional Rights” that the Constitution defined the original rights of citizens in this country.  The Preamble alone tells you the Constitution was drafted to protect a system of legal process.  In my personal opinion the closest the Preamble comes to expressing the rights of citizens is in Article IV where it states what the system is allowed to do with persons charged of a crime.  The Amendments that follow give us the illusion of citizen rights, but in actuality in only gives us the foundation of argument for cases to be decided in court.

Deflated by my conclusion and groggy from lack of sleep, I dragged on through the day not even wanting to talk about what I had learned.  I wasn’t sure if it was significant, or something fabricated by exhausted brain that had somehow fallen victim to insomnia. So last night, I crawled into bed early thinking I could make up a little of what I lost the night before, but again, I couldn’t sleep.  Several hours and routine security checks around the house later, I found myself finally slipping off to sleep as I watched CBS “Up to the Minute”.  Amazingly on the border of dreamland, I heard “Coming up next, a story about The U.S. Constitution that you don’t want to miss.”  Seriously?

The story turned out to be about a four part series premiering tonight that you may want to set your DVR’s for, or if you’re reading this after the fact you can look it up over at Constitution USA with Peter Sagal. The reason I’m writing to you today is because I am hoping that my words here have peaked your interests just as much as mine have been over this issue, and that maybe you wouldn’t want to miss this special.  It might be a really great lesson for you and the kids about this great country of ours.  Raise Em Educated, Raise Em Real. 

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Parental Awareness Alert

Posted on May 1, 2013 by

Ashland-Greenwood+High+SchoolDrug testing policies are becoming increasingly common in schools around the country, yet parents are less aware of the practice, or more important, the possible ramifications of the process, more than ever.  The parents of a Lincoln Nebraska high school student learned the hard way this week that school involvement reaches further than PTA meetings and school conferences.  I have no doubt that attending any meetings arranged by these organizations during the course of the school year would have informed them of the random drug testing policy enforced upon their daughter without consent, and I’m pretty sure one of those meeting held a vote to put the policy in effect.  Hind sight is indeed a bitch, so I am here to give you parents a little foresight.

Public school policy is not what it used to be.  Educational institutions are not only juggling the politics of educating your child, but they also have to implement policy to help police and parent children who lack active parental involvement in school and at home.  We live in a society that believes schools are designed to not only educate, but parent their child for 8 hours a day.  As a result, they are doing just that.  Only public school parenting is a lot like public safety enforcement.  So now the question is, “Who do you want to discipline your child for experimenting with drugs?” This particular case is interesting in the fact that the child was caught in the middle of a two month investigation in the illegal sale of Adderall. Not quiet an illegal drug, but the child was caught using illegal means of obtaining the drug without a prescription, and this act gave the school the authority to drug test the child on the spot without the student or the parents’ consent.  So far all reports have shown the school to be completely within confines of the law, however my gut tells me there’s at least one HIPAA violation in the ordeal.  But this is not for me to decide, it is up to a court of law, which is where these parents are heading next.

So here’s my suggestion:  Teach your children their Miranda Rights.

1. You have the right to remain silent.

Tell your children that do not have to say anything more than, “Call my parents. I reserve my right to remain silent until they arrive.”

2. Anything you say or do can be used against you in a court of law.

Let them know that ANYTHING they say or do can get them into further trouble, this includes submitting hair samples, swabs, urine, ect.

3. You have the right to have an attorney present now and during any future questioning.

Even if you can’t afford an attorney, you can act as representation for your child.

4. If you cannot afford an attorney, one will be appointed to you free of charge if you wish.

If charges are pressed, encourage your child to say nothing until you have spoken to an appointed attorney.  Remember, the law is quick to catch up the innocent, and you don’t want to be on that side of the law.

This is not an effort to teach them how to get out of trouble.  This is an effort to encourage you to know your rights, and teach them to your children. It is not acceptable for them to defy authority but at the same time, they need to know when authority is being abused.  Raise Em Aware, Raise Em Real.

 

*Source:  http://www.1011now.com/home/headlines/Parent-Upset-With-School-Following-Drug-Arrests-205485781.html

 

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