Oh She Stirred The Right Mom Here! (Response to Moms Dressing Like Slobs Post)

jodi-headshot01This post is to put Jodi Meltzer on BLAST.   When I read her post in theStir, I like most mothers was appalled.  I couldn’t question her position until I knew more about her so I did my research.  The last thing I wanted to do was blast a woman with multiple children who really puts in hard work like most of the mothers out here in the world who don’t have time for full makeup when dropping their kids off at school, just so that they can come back home and scrub the toilet after a son who couldn’t aim to save his life.  I don’t know how many mothers out there put on pearls to do laundry and wash dishes, but I’m not one of them.  As a matter of fact the only mothers out there I know of that put on full makeup and jewelry just to drop their kids off at school also have maids. I’m sure Meltzer does as well, because when I see her profile pictures she not only strikes me as someone who doesn’t do housework, but someone who doesn’t do all the cooking she claims to do for her MommyDish blog.  Ok, I take that back, I’ve seen the pictures of her food and I can believe she prepared that bullshit. I guess I can cut her some slack on that because after all, she did just lose her crockpot virginity last year.

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I don’t know why, but I get the feeling that she has a Rosa or Lupita that visits her house often.  And I know I’m not far off here because she’s a vegetarian that shops at Macy’s.  Most of us moms that wear the dreaded yoga pants she speaks of are lucky to be able to grace a Target and seldom ever have a Mall Budget.

I knew when researching her she was a mother of just one, because her expectations of motherhood were just too unrealistic.  I understand that she has a teenage step daughter, but when we’re talking about sheer exhaustion brought on by children we can generally count out teenagers because they can wipe their own asses and make their own snacks.  But when you have multiple children under the age of ten, you have a full time job in which you are always on-call for.  And God forbid you are a stay at home mother because unlike many people want to believe, you don’t get to sit at home and do nothing all day.  You cook, clean, do laundry, shop for household supplies (not shoes), and manage a family schedule.  Having multiple children also means that you can’t afford to hire help.  You are the help.  Meltzer says in her post, “there’s no reason to literally roll out of bed and into the car.”  Seriously???  Are you for real???  First of all Mrs. Privileged, most of us moms don’t roll out of bed and into the car.  There’s a big gap that you left out in between these two events, which further leads me to believe that you have hired help.  Most of my readers know that I have four children under the age of 6 and one teenager.  My mornings tend to be a blur, but my children look picture perfect when we leave the house.  And that’s my job.  When I had children I elected to put them first and my own vanity on a shelf.  So if I don’t have the time to shower, or dress before I get them where they need to be on time, then that’s what I signed up for.  I’m happy with that and I don’t need a mean girl bully like you to pick on my attire at the bus stop because I can’t afford to look as fabulous as you do in the mornings.  Frankly, none of us mothers should give a damn about what Meltzer or people like her think about our attire or grooming practices because when it comes down to it, they could never do what we do.  Not without medication anyway.  Mrs. Meltzer, I know that much of what I’ve said here probably hurt your feelings, but perhaps now you know how your judgmental post hurt the feelings of the many moms in your social circle who probably read this and thought you were talking about them. (Which you probably were)  I hope you’re reading this because if I could, I’d tell you that until you walk a mile in our shoes, you need stay the hell out of our yoga and pajama pants.

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Mom Arrested For Dropping The F Bomb

26281655_BG1Why do I suddenly feel like we live in the land of the illusion of the free?  Amendment rights are being stepped on, ignored, and nullified on an as needed basis in this country every day.  Are we citizens in the U.S. so out of control that our police state has to take matters as far as they have been in the past year?  They’re shooting children and disabled people, flash bombing infants, and using illegal choke holds to murder unarmed fathers in the streets right in front of us and our constant recording cell phones.  I’ll admit these past stories lines that I just mentioned are horrendous in nature, but now this police state has sunk to an all time new low in the arrest of Danielle Christine Wolf, 22 of Augusta, GA. If you have ever had to bring multiple children into the grocery store with you while attempting to complete your shopping, then you know what a challenge this can be.  It’s a non-stop task of monitoring them, trying not to forget anything on your list, keeping unwanted items out of your buggy, calculating to make sure you stay within your budget, breaking up fights, stopping for tantrums, answering a million questions, having to say, “NO” 337 times, and of course trying to avoid hearing, “Clean up on isle (fill in the blank)” over the intercom.  If you can make it through the entire store without cursing you are on your way to Sainthood.

I completely disagree with derogatory speech directed at children because I believe that how we talk to them has a profound and lasting affect, and it also teaches them how they should interact socially with the rest of the world.  Therefore it’s up to us to lead by example.  Yet we can’t forget that as parents we are still human, we do get frustrated, and many of us use profanity when we do.  I’m an advocate for profanity because I love and embrace language, and I believe that none of it should be shunned.  Fuck happens to be one of my favorite four letter words.  It can be used in any verbal tense, has a way of fitting into any situation, and has a multitude of meanings.  Now I’m sure we can find a correlation between this mother’s young age and her inappropriate use of it towards her children, but for it to be made criminal to the point that you put her in handcuffs in front of her children is criminal in itself.  Not only was this an infringement upon her First Amendment rights, it was traumatic for her kids, and a waste of tax payer’s money.  And let me tell you, if police are going to start arresting people for dropping F-Bombs in public then I’m going to have to start making sure that I look good every time I leave the house so that my mug shots are fabulous.   And if someone does try to arrest me for saying Fuck in public, I will say it so much while being put in handcuffs that I will break some kind of fucking record.  Keep your cell phones recording people!

(Full Story Here)

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Have You Hugged Your Child Today?

WXMI-vid2127-in3384-out6024-9f1ae488-53e0d6c4-LargeImageA 12 year old boy stabbed a 9 year old boy on the playground Monday.  This baby went and took the life of another child because he felt “like nobody loved him”.  I understand that it’s no excuse for what he’s done, but you can tell the child was not sociopathic because he immediately turned himself in after committing this crime.  He knew that what he’d done was wrong, and acted appropriately.  It’s what drove him to this crime that disturbs me.  Children should never feel this way, and there are too many out here in the world that do.  It’s time that we start reaching out as a community and not just as parents.  It’s time that we stop saying, “It’s none of our business”, and start making it our business ro see to it that these children are cared for.  It starts with you and me.  If you see something, say something.  Story Here

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Teachers Gone Bad

1406779313000-1st-grade-studentI read a news story a couple of days ago that infuriated me because I have child going into the 1st grade here in a couple of weeks.  The child was caught drawing on a school desk, was reprimanded by the teacher, made to clean the desk, missed recess, and took a trip to the principals office for a lecture.  This to me was punishment enough.  But not for the teacher.  The teacher continued the punishment by taking the child’s desk and forcing her to sit on the floor in front of all her peers for weeks.  I repeat, weeks, also telling her that she would not get a new desk until she went to the second grade.  The child was too afraid to tell this to her mother because she felt that what she had done was so bad that she didn’t deserve a desk.  The mother had been made aware of the initial disciplinary actions but had no clue about the continuing discipline until one day her daughter finally broke down and told her.

If any of you know me, then you know this would have been a “Code Black” situation at the school.  Because I would have taken a sledge hammer up to that school and took my frustration and anger out on that teachers desk. (After school of course so the rest of the students wouldn’t witness the violence) And in the time period that it took the school district to order and or replace that desk, her ass would have known how my child felt as she sat on the floor completing her daily work.  Yes I probably would have went jail, but I have good family and friends who would have posted my bail and took care of my kids until I got out.  But I’m also willing to bet that she wouldn’t have bullied another student in her career.

Which brings me to the newest story coming out of Florida where a teacher has been accused of paddling students and putting them in a dark closet as punishment.  Read Story Here  According to the local D.A. he is unable to press charges against the teacher because of Florida state laws which allow corporal punishment.  How does this work?  Well, when you drop your children off at school the school administration and teachers assume custody of your child for that brief period.  This is why you sign all of those papers when you enroll them.  This custody situation gives them the right to instruct, discipline, and treat your child anyway that they want to within legal limits because they are acting in your place as parents for as long as they have them.  If corporal punishment is allow in your state, then your child’s teacher will be allowed to spank your child even if you don’t agree with it.  Now keep in mind that this is all has to been in accordance with School Board Standards so that PTA meeting that you’ve been missing all these years is no where near as important as the School Board meetings that you’ve opted to wave your right to sit in on.  So I encourage you parents to check the laws in your state.  Don’t assume that your child is safe because they are in school, or that their teachers are going to treat and love them just as you would. There are many teacher out there that shouldn’t be allowed within 100 feet of children, but work with your child every day.  By staying informed, we keep them safe.  By keeping them safe we’re raisin’ em real.

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Are You Monitoring These Facebook Challenges???

ChallengesSo, it well known that I spend quite a bit of time on Facebook.  And here lately I have noticed a very disturbing trend of challenges that are being passed along among the kids.  It started with the cold water challenge, and yes I was called out.  But a’int nobody got time for that.  If I want to give to charity I can do so without dumping ice water on myself.  Hell,  the ten minute commercials for various charities on television are torturous enough.  The cold water challenge eventually turned into a big joke as people were just pouring ice water on themselves and charities weren’t seeing a dime.  So that died down really quickly.  But leave it to our children to kick it up a notch with The Fire Challenge.  Yes, kids are pouring alcohol on themselves and setting fire to it.  Geniuses right?  Of course not because they obviously failed Chemistry and Biology if they for even a second thought this was a good idea.

Check out this dumbass whose mother was present while he did it if you haven’t these already.

 

But WAIT!!! THERE”S MORE…

They didn’t stop with the fire challenge.  Now they have this stupid challenge called The Pass Out Challenge.  This is where kids hyperventilate and then have some cut off their oxygen supply until they are rendered unconscious.  Genius right?  NO.  This kills brain cells at a massive rate and if you weren’t stupid before, when you wake up you’ll be one step closer to that goal.

It’s not funny parents and it’s not cute.  These challenges could kill your children and then the real challenge is going to be paying the financial and emotional cost of burying them.  Address this with your children and talk to them about this now.  This was you won’t be talking to the news later about how much you’re going to miss them.

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I’m Still Raisin Em Real

I know you guys have been wondering where I’ve been.  Well, to be honest, I’m going through a divorce.  It’s been a very difficult and tough time on my children and myself, so I have had to take time away from the blog to focus more on them and putting our lives back together.  The circumstances of my divorce involve domestic violence, and I will be writing about that soon as well.  But the most important thing is that we are still here, we are still a family, and first and foremost, I am still a mother.

So, I came across a song I wrote and recorded 12 years ago and just give you guys an update on how we’ve been growing this past year I made this video to share with you all as a reminder that I am still alive and kicking.  And most important, I’m still Raisin Em Real.  I promise I’ll be back soon, I haven’t forgotten you all.  Much love.

Kandice

P.S.  And share the video if you like it!!!

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Mom Walks Across Cafeteria Tables to Assault Daughter’s Bully

nallWhen your child comes home crying that someone has hurt them, whether it be just their feelings or physically, your first response is anger.  But ladies, ladies, ladies….we must contain ourselves.  This story (found here) is just outrageous.  She fought administrators to get into the building and then walked, excuse me, ran across lunch tables to get to the girl who was probably three times younger than she was.  Don’t lock this woman up in jail, commit her to mental institution because that was just insane.  I understand that bullying has reached a new level with access to social media these days but after hearing Frank Gallagher’s speech on bullying, I’m thinking of it in a new way now.  He says, “Bullying is vital part of every ecosystem, it teaches kids resilience.  The world is a rough place and bullying is like getting inoculated.  It’s a vaccine.”  There’s more to the speech and it’s golden, a must see.  I’ll post it below.  After you watch it, you might not be so inclined to overreact to the actions of your child’s bully, and the way the world works just might make a little more sense to you.

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